Lock your phone to unlock your life - an interview with my husband

Like many couples, my husband and I have many conversations about phone use. Months ago he mentioned opting for an extreme method - locking his apps and giving me the key. I thought he was joking until he bought a Padlock app and handed me the key to hide away. I have to admit, I wasn't sure it would work out, assuming he would give up, ask me for the key and then 'lose' it somewhere! But its been weeks and we've seen positive changes. I decided to interview him to find out more about his experience. Personally, having a more present husband and father to my kids is always a blessing (he is already an engaged husband and father, locking away his phone has just supercharged this). And yes, it makes me reflect on my own phone use more...

Warmest wishes

Nicola x

PS: If you have any questions for him I will gladly send them his way.

How did you feel when you first started this?

I’d never really thought of myself as someone with a smartphone addiction — that was something that happened to other, less self-aware people, surely not me. But like any addiction, sometimes you don’t realise you have a problem until something interrupts the pattern. When I first started using the Padlock app, I felt strangely exposed — suddenly I had to face how often I’d reach for my phone, not because I needed it, but out of pure habit. It felt like I’d stumbled into an intervention I didn’t know I needed.

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Did you notice the need to check to begin with?

Absolutely. The first thing I noticed was how automatic it was — I’d unlock my phone without even thinking, searching for something, any app to open. But they were locked, and there was nothing to do. It really made me aware of how much I’d conditioned myself to default to my phone for stimulation, especially in moments of boredom. It was like breaking a spell — I’d been on autopilot and hadn’t even realised it.

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How do you feel a few weeks in?

Even after just a week, my screen time dropped by a third. More importantly, I felt happier. I wasn’t doomscrolling Twitter or mindlessly flicking through Instagram memes — and I didn’t miss it. Even when my phone was unlocked, the urge to scroll felt boring, hollow, pointless. What felt genuinely interesting again was real life: spending time with my wife and kids, noticing their little quirks, actually being present. It hasn’t magically cured my habits overnight, but it has given me back time — and with it, a sense that I’m living more consciously.

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What are you doing with your spare time?

I’m simply spending more time with my family — properly with them, not half-listening while my attention’s buried in my phone. I’m watching Bluey with my kids instead of disappearing into Twitter mid-episode. I feel more patient, more energetic, more engaged in the moment. It sounds dramatic, but I do feel like I’ve got a bit of my life back — the life I’d be wishing for when I’m older, looking back. And all it took was a small padlock to remind me what really deserves my attention.